Who knew that New Year’s Eve 1994 at Hollywood’s Sanctuary Club would be the breeding ground for a relationship that wouldn’t only rock the rock music world, but the world as a whole? It was a magical night for Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee as it was the moment the drummer and the actress first met. And to say there were sparks would be the understatement of the year.
The Earth moved when these two planted eyes (and tongues) on each other. Just take Pam’s recollection from that moment: “He came up, grabbed me and licked my face,” she said back in 1995. “I thought he was a cool, friendly, nice guy. I gave him my number.”
The rest, folks, is history.
Lust at First Sight
Pamela and Tommy are by far one of Hollywood’s (better yet – the world’s) most notorious ‘90s couples. They’re the couple you kind of wish you could be but also would never introduce your parents – or your children – to. They’re wild, raunchy, and shameless. And that’s why we can’t keep our eyes off them.
And it all began on that very night at the Sanctuary Club. Tommy told Rolling Stone that it was Pam who made the first move. How? By ordering him a shot of Goldschlager. For Tommy (who revealed that he was already high at the point), that’s all it took.
We Can Imagine
“On Ecstasy, Joan Rivers looks like Pamela Anderson,” Tommy shared, “so imagine what Pamela Anderson looked like. I just stared at her all night, and she just stared back.” Believe it or not, these two didn’t consummate their relationship that night.
Tommy told Rolling Stone that the problem with meeting someone you like in LA is that “everybody is always too busy to get together.” Their plans to meet up again kept getting canceled due to Pam’s work commitments. Apparently, Pam said she was initially turned off Tommy’s relentless pursuit, but she eventually gave in.
The Girl of His Dreams
They chatted on the phone, and she told him she had to head to Cancun for a photoshoot. Pam recalled in a Movieline interview around the time that he teased her, saying, “You’re going [to Cancun] without me?” She said she “begged him not to come down there.”
His response: “OK. See you later,” which Pam thought was a “weird way for the conversation to end.” Tommy, who obviously couldn’t think of anything or anyone else, followed her down there. If it was any other dude, it might have been seen as stalkerish. Tommy himself said his actions were comparable to stalking…
Hunting Her Down Like a Stalker
He described how he “called the hotel every five minutes until they began to pity me.” He said he left messages at her house, at her friends’ houses; everywhere. “I was hunting her down like a little f***ing stalker.”
If it happened today, he might have even been arrested. But this was 1995, and he was Mötley Crüe’s drummer, and she was the Baywatch girl. There was no time for thinking whether it was too fast – or too soon. These two lived in the fast lane, and Tommy was going after the woman of his dreams.
First Comes Lust, Then Comes Marriage
Despite the fact that Tommy basically crashed her Cancun photo shoot and was somewhat of a turn-off for Pam at the get-go, they were all over each other in Mexico. The two were seen sipping Cristal champagne and partying all night and went to the Friday night string bikini contest.
Even more reckless was his spur-of-the-moment decision to propose to a woman he hardly knew. Their official second “date” in Mexico, which occurred six weeks after they first met at the club, quickly (and I mean quickly) turned into marriage.
Champagne, Bikini Contests, and a Proposal
How did Tommy pop the question? He put it rather eloquently: “I took off my pinky ring, put it on her finger and asked her to marry me. She said yes, hugged me and stuck her tongue down my throat.” Aw, just like in the fairytales.
And so, after non-stop partying within a 96-hour timeframe, Tommy (then 33) and Pamela (then 28) got hitched. The two lovebirds wasted no time and walked down the sandy aisle the very next day at an impromptu beach ceremony on February 19, 1995.
Tattooed Ring Fingers and Barefoot “I Dos”
While it was Pam’s first marriage (of five), it was Tommy’s third (of four). And so, the young lovers threw caution to the wind and got hitched right there in Cancun. They got married so fast they didn’t even have time to get rings. Instead, they tattooed each other’s names on their ring fingers.
Their small beach wedding included just eight guests, all of them barefoot, who came to watch a small but legendary wedding take place. Pam wore a white bikini and Tommy wore khaki cutoffs. After the ceremony, Tommy threw Pam into the ocean.
So, This Is Really Happening
The couple was in shock. Tommy recalled their plane ride back home to LA, saying the closer they got, the “harder reality began to hit us.” Pam turned to him and asked him, “Do you want to go to your house or mine?”
When he told her he had a place in Malibu on the beach, the answer was obvious – they were going to Tommy’s. The moment they walked off the plane at LAX, they were swarmed with photographers. They had to fight their way to his car.
And Then She Called Home
As they pulled up to the house, they saw how paparazzi had camped out all night just to get a shot of the newlyweds arriving home. They went from the “total-freedom paradise of Cancún to this hellish prison of Hollywood Babylon,” Tommy recalled.
What they did was hire 24-hour security, but they couldn’t prevent the masses from forming around them. According to Tommy, things got worse once Pam called home to tell her family of the news. Her mom flipped out and told her to file for divorce immediately.
Her Brother Wanted to Kick His A$$
Her brother asked Pam for their address so he could come over “and personally kick my a$$,” Tommy shared. Pam’s mother later told People that the wedding was “heartbreaking and shocking.” But Mrs. Anderson wasn’t the only one baffled by the sudden union. The truth is no one thought they were going to work.
A decision so hasty can only lead to trouble. With a beginning as intense as theirs, it was only a matter of time until sh*t hit the fan. For these newlyweds, the scandals came just as quickly as the wedding did.
In Other Words, She Was Better Than Heather
Despite it all, the newlyweds aimed high. And high they were. They began their married life together in Tommy’s house, living a life we can only dream of. Meanwhile, the world watched in surprise and amusement as the ultimate pinup girl committed herself to the rocker who was known for “bingeing on groupies, drugging heroically and swallowing small light bulbs for kicks.”
Tommy said that the beginning was as amazing as it should be. It was everything he had wanted since his marriage to Heather Locklear (they were married from 1986 to 1993). Pam was also “a lot more easygoing and fun to be with.”
Pam and Tommy found themselves paddling up sh*t’s creek the same month they got married. By the end of February 1995, the tape was leaked, and we can thank a man named Rand Gauthier, an electrician, for that (he’s the one played by Seth Rogan in the series).
The (meant to be private) sex tape wasn’t the couple’s only scandal, by any means. It was, however, the most memorable and talked about one. Pam and Tommy were living rockstar lives, but they didn’t expect things to get so insane so fast.
Not long after Pam moved in, Rand Gauthier started doing electrical work at the property. He got to see firsthand the lavish lifestyle these two were really living. But one day, they decided to let him go.
He wasn’t expecting the sudden termination and was even more baffled when the rich and famous couple refused to settle $20,000 in payments. So, Rand came to the home to collect his tools only to be met with Tommy holding a shotgun pointed at him.
Rand’s Revenge on the Lees
The drummer demanded that Rand leave immediately. Why was Tommy so pissed off? Was he just high? Or was he reacting to something more serious? In 2014, Rand told Rolling Stone that he never planned to steal anything from the Lees, but Tommy essentially drove him to it.
After he told Rand to “Get the f*** off [his] property,” Rand wanted revenge. He then came up with a plot to carry out a burglary. The plan: to steal something from their safe in their garage. Inside it were Tommy’s guns and Pamela’s jewelry. What he didn’t expect to find – and take – was the tape.
The Most Infamous Stolen Celebrity Artifact on the Planet
Rand didn’t know that he would become famous for stealing what Rolling Stone called “the most infamous stolen celebrity artifact on the planet, with a wink usually accompanying the word ‘stolen.’” The tape included the couple’s most intimate of moments, so to speak, which they made during their honeymoon.
Pamela later clarified (in an interview with Andy Cohen) that it “was not a sex tape,” rather a “compilation of vacations that we were naked on.” It was a 54-minute-long tape of a couple in love, and chances are they weren’t expecting it to be the most-watched video online.
What Happens on the Honeymoon… Stays on the Internet
Either way, Rand took the tape, leaked it onto the internet, and the world was never the same again. A police report was filed at first, and a $10 million lawsuit was launched against Rand (and his accomplices), but the damage was done. Tommy and Pam had absolutely no way of retracting the tape.
In 1997, Pam and Tommy sued Internet Entertainment Group because they were the ones who distributed the downloaded copies of the tape and put them on video store shelves. It took until 2002 to settle (for an undisclosed amount).
Most of It Was Rather Boring
Despite the settlement, the tape itself was still being freely distributed. Of the 54 minutes of home footage, only a few minutes were, um, titillating. The truth is that the newlyweds were taping rather mundane moments in their wild ride of a life.
In the video, you can see Tommy pointing out a tomato that was growing in the couple’s driveway, some blurry footage of their beach wedding ceremony, Pam getting a tattoo, and the pair hanging out in their jacuzzi while their home was being renovated in the background.
This Was No Publicity Stunt
A recent podcast called Tabloid looked into the tape after all these years. For those who never saw or heard what went on in the tape, there were only a few minutes of sexual activity. And for the most part, it was “boring, predictable, intimate.”
They’re heard saying “I love you” at the end. It’s not the kind you would expect from the edgy couple. And unlike Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian’s notorious tapes, which came after, this one was never meant to be shared.
The World Keeps Turning
Pam and Tommy didn’t really receive much sympathy; no one was crying a river for the couple, whom many people believed wanted the tape to be seen for publicity. As the trials, and perhaps a bit of shame, ensued, the couple tried to move past it.
In fact, they decided to become parents. In June 1996, they welcomed Brandon Thomas Lee to the world, followed by Dylan Jagger Lee in December 1997. Let’s just say that the transition from an unruly couple to mom and dad was something akin to shell shock for Pam and Tommy.
Rubber Dresses and High Heels… for Him and His Friends
They had their good days, though, when the wild and crazy couple were happy living a wild and crazy life. Pam recalled how Tommy would have his friends over, and she would get them to wear her “rubber dresses.” Heck, these dudes were “kickboxing in my bikinis once.”
She would buy him presents like a box of high heels. But they weren’t for her. The pair of 10½ men’s size heels were for him. And you better be sure he put them on. “If Tommy is in a bad mood, I go upstairs and come down wearing this 3-foot-high Mad Hatter hat. He looks at me and cracks up.”
He Wanted to Be No. 1 Forever
Tommy later said that he attributed the decline in their relationship to the change in their dynamic after their sons were born. He said that when Dylan was born, he “dropped down to No. 3… I was full-on non-existent. And I couldn’t deal with that.”
There were high moments as well as low ones, like when Pam suffered a miscarriage in 1995. There were also rumors about the jealous Tommy keeping a tight grip on Pam, particularly keeping a tight grip on her when she worked on 1995’s Barb Wire.
Tommy Attacks Pam
Well, jealousy is one thing, but attacking the mother of your children is something else. In February of 1998, the couple became the subjects of yet another scandal. Tommy attacked Pamela while she was holding their son Dylan, who was seven weeks old at the time.
By May 1998, Tommy was charged with spousal abuse and sentenced to six months in the slammer. He pleaded no-contest to the felony charges, which accused him of kicking his wife several times while she held their baby. Pam spoke publicly at the time…
Tommy Goes to Prison for Spousal Abuse
Outside the courthouse, Pam told reporters, “I’m very proud of Tommy. I’m happy he took responsibility for this. And I think it’s the first step towards healing.” In 2012, she explained what really happened.
“Tommy physically attacked me with complete disregard for my safety and, more importantly, for the safety of our children.” She continued to describe how he kicked her “violently in the back several times and in the buttocks. He was completely out of control.” Tommy was originally given three years, but it was suspended based on the terms of his probation.
Days Later, Pam Filed for Divorce
He was to avoid drugs and alcohol, attend anger management counseling, commit to 200 hours of community service, donate $5,000 to a battered women’s shelter and keep more than 100 yards distance from Pamela. In the end, he served only four months in jail.
Within days of the attack, Pam filed for divorce. Their three-year marriage was over. A year later, there were discussions of reconciliation (“I picture Tommy and me…old, toothless, on a bench somewhere with our tattoos”) and about a decade later, they got back together (after her two failed marriages to Kid Rock and Rick Salomon).
Divorce and Dreams of Growing Old Together
Of course, this didn’t mean the two stopped fighting. Tommy said they gave it “only” 800 tries. This was no. 801, to which he said, “here we go.” Let’s just say that Tommy was more realistic in this case. By 2010, they went their separate ways for the last time.
Pam later told People that “There was Tommy and then there was nobody else,” adding that he was the love of her life. “We had wild and crazy beginnings that was too much for both of us.”
They Both Moved On… I Guess?
The pair have moved on, each finding others to cast their baggage onto. For Pam, she married two more men after her last swing at making it work with Tommy. She was married twice in 2020 to two men: first to Hollywood producer Jon Peters, whom she married and divorced within the same year, and then to Dan Hayhurst, her bodyguard, with whom she is still (as of late 2021).
As for Tommy, he was engaged to a Greek-German singer named Sofia Toufa in the mid-2010s, but it didn’t work out. He then met and went on to marry social media celebrity Brittany Furlan in 2019.
The Event That Sparked the “Alcoholism Is the Devil” Blog Post
They may have found new significant others, but the co-parents will always be in contact. In 2018, Pamela called her ex-husband the “definition of narcissist/sociopath” in a blog post, in which she spoke of his alcoholism.
She wrote it after their son Brandon (who was 21 at the time) knocked his dad unconscious. Why? Well, Tommy’s story goes like this: he was hanging out at home with Furlan when Brandon barged in and assaulted him. When he asked his son to leave, Brandon knocked him out.
The Time Brandon Lee Knocked His Dad Unconscious
Brandon’s story was very different. Brandon claimed that he was working hard to organize an intervention for his father who is apparently always drunk. The intervention never came to fruition, though, because of all the drama.
Brandon also explained that the fight began when he started defending his mother, which angered his dad, who then started the fight. In other words, Brandon was forced to defend himself. Furlan, the one who called 911, supported Tommy’s version of the story. It was a real sh*t show, and Pamela felt the need to say something about it.
“Alcoholism Is the Devil”
Pam wrote her heart out. She wrote, “Nobody understands the lifetime of disappointment this man has brought our family,” referring to how Tommy was relentlessly the “center of sadness, drama and confusion.”
She said how he was jealous of his sons’ talent and beauty ever since they were born. She said he was “sick” before going on to call him a narcissist and sociopath. “I have always tried only to set the record straight,” she wrote, but he has “never taken responsibility for what he has done.”
Who Is Pamela Anderson Married To?
She may hate the devil that alcohol turned her husband into, but she’ll always be grateful to him for the boys he gave her. “I had beautiful children with him,” she shared. “My kids are grateful to be born out of true love.”
The man Pamela is now married to is a fellow Canadian named Dan Hayhurst. The bodyguard and the Baywatch alum quietly married on Christmas Eve in 2020 in their home on Vancouver Island. Who knows? Maybe going back to her roots is what Pam needed.
They Want Nothing to Do With the Show
After all, Hollywood does have a way of sucking people into its darkness. This is Pamela’s fifth marriage yet sixth wedding ceremony (she married Rick Salomon twice). The fact that the former madly-in-love couple moved on makes no difference to the media.
Pamela and Tommy will forever be immortalized, not just with the notorious tape, but with the Hulu series Pam and Tommy (portrayed by Lily James and Sebastian Stan). It seems like the real Pam and Tommy want nothing to do with the series.
A “Cheap Knockoff”
Her representative stated: “Pamela has no intention of watching this God-awful show, absolutely not. Never.” The rep went on to say that Pam has never even heard of the actors playing her or Tommy, nor does she want to know them.
She and her family think the show is a cheap knockoff. Tommy was a little less harsh with his reaction. “I know Sebastian; he’s playing me. From what he’s told me, it’s a really beautiful story,” Tommy shared. He also mentioned that it’s “really about privacy and how things got crazy then” and that the laws are different now.
It Wasn’t Cool at All
Tommy also shared that while he’s actually excited to see the story play out on the small screen, he can’t help but remember how painful the real-life situation was. He said the story’s cool, but “what actually happened wasn’t” cool at all.
A longtime friend of Pamela’s had her own words to share about the whole thing. Courtney Love has been harsh in her words about the series and the fact that Lily James is portraying one of her best friends.
Yeah, Let’s See What Courtney Love Has to Say About It
In a since-deleted Facebook post from May 16, 2021, Love said she found the idea of the show to be “so f***ing outrageous,” with its existence “further causing” Pamela “complex trauma.” According to Hulu, however, the show is “a comedic limited series on the true story behind the release of the first-ever viral video in history.”
Love said that she was asked if she would approve the use of her December 1994 Rolling Stone cover for the show. Her answer was exactly what you expect it to be: “F*** no.”
Seth Rogan Developed It
If there’s anything sweet that comes out of Love’s mouth, it’s the part where she said, “My heart goes out to Pammy.” But then she added, “shame on Lily James, whoever the f*** she is.” Pam and Tommy didn’t contribute, so the forces of Hulu had to roll up their sleeves.
The series was developed by Seth Rogen (who plays Rand, the electrician) as well as Evan Goldberg and was written by Rob Siegel and directed by Craig Gillespie. The team is all about comedy, as is the cast, including Nick Offerman, Taylor Schilling, and Andrew Dice Clay.
Who Is Tommy Lee Married To?
Tommy started dating Brittany Furlan in early 2017. On Valentine’s Day 2018, they posted news of their engagement on Instagram. “Say hello to the future Mrs. Lee.” The next Valentine’s Day, they tied the knot. Furlan revealed that the two followed each other on Instagram for years before they ever met.
She was once the queen of Vine (in the days before TikTok). The pair don’t have any kids yet. Now, what does Pamela have to say about their marriage? Well, she doesn’t seem to be such a big fan.
A Match Made in Heaven?
According to interviews, Furlan and Pamela aren’t on good terms. In fact, Pam blocked her on social media when she started dating Tommy. Furlan told Fox News: “She had never met me and had no care to meet me.”
She said she could tell from the get-go that Pam wasn’t happy about her being in their life. After the 2018 incident with Brandon and Tommy, Pamela publicly stated that she doesn’t think Furlan is a good match for Tommy. At the time, she was still his fiancé…
He Has a What on His Arm?
“His fiancé keeps him drunk — this is what he wants — someone to behave badly with. It’s terrible,” Pam wrote in a blog post. Tommy Lee is no stranger to scandals and lawsuits; those involving Pamela are just a few in his felony catalog.
There was a lawsuit in 1998, for example, when he allegedly exposed a swastika tattoo on his arm. Is the former rocker anti-Semitic? It’s debatable. Two years before that, he pleaded no contest to battery against a Jewish photographer after he attacked the man outside the Viper Room club in LA.
A Stupid Tattoo, They Say
At the time of the lawsuit for the battery charge, Tommy had the swastika tattoo (which has since been removed). The photographer said the tattoo was visible when Tommy attacked him. It was only after the mention of the tattoo in the court record that Tommy denied its existence.
His attorney said the swastika was a “stupid tattoo obtained several years ago.” So, that was one lawsuit that further tainted the guy’s already ruined reputation. But that wasn’t the last of it.
Another Piece of Bad Press
In 1997, Tommy and his former Mötley Crüe band member Nikki Sixx were arrested in North Carolina after starting a riot during a concert at Greensboro Coliseum. Sixx allegedly made some racist comments to a Black security guard.
He suggested the crowd attack him, apparently. Both Sixx and Tommy were said to have poured beer over the man’s head. Tommy is just one of those bad boys who feed off misbehaving, and the bad press will probably continue to follow him until his last days.
The Boy Who Drowned in Tommy’s Pool
As if Tommy wasn’t problematic enough, the worst of it happened on June 16, 2001. 4-year-old Daniel Karven-Veres tragically drowned in Tommy’s swimming pool during a birthday party for 5-year-old Brandon.
Daniel’s parents, James and Ursula, sued Tommy for negligence, but he was finally cleared in 2003. It was determined that the boy had been left alone “for a minute,” according to the 911 call Tommy himself made. In the call, Tommy said, “There’s a big pool party here, and no one was paying attention for a minute.”
Inexcusable Is an Understatement
When the 911 operator asked if the boy’s chest or stomach was rising, Tommy said he didn’t know, but that “everyone is pressing in on him.” The operator then urgently told Tommy to make sure people stopped doing that.
Tommy sounded agitated and was basically freaking out (“I don’t know what the f*** to do. OK?”). The boy was pronounced dead at the hospital. The boy’s father, a TV producer, told a local radio station that more people should have been there – hired – to supervise the kids. His son’s death was thus “inexcusable.”